I have to go to Florida this weekend. Yes, I know, I shouldn't complain...it's cold here and warm there. But in the aftermath of this election, I just don't know if I'm ready... to step foot in a Red State. Scary though. Will walking around with the Constitution in my back pocket be protection enough??
Friday, November 05, 2004
Thursday, November 04, 2004
Blue America
This was emailed to me and I thought it was worth posting.
Blue America Charter
Fellow citizens!
It gives me great happiness to unveil our plans for the liberation ofBlue America. For the past three years, we have, in conjunction with a handful of MIT engineers, been constructing a giant, cordless circular saw,which is now complete. With this saw, we plan to carve our thriving,prosperous eastern Blue nation away from the spreading infection of red america. We will then set a mighty sail, which will carry us around the tip ofSouth America and allow us to join our Blue compadres on the West Coast. We will use our giant saw to free our friends, then join our two lands together and sail to a designated point in the Pacific Ocean. There, we will establish our new country: Blue America.
Basic Tenets
Blue America will be founded on the same ideals as the former UnitedStates of America. These ideals, sadly, have been decimated by the same redplague that scrambled the brains of so many of our unfortunate former fellow-citizens. These ideals include:
- The Separation of Church and State
- Freedom of Speech
- Freedom of Assembly and Protest
- Equal rights for all and due process under the Constitution
Blue America will have many additional aspirations not shared by red america, including:
- The goal of giving every citizen high quality education and healthcare (even prescription drugs!), regardless of their race, ethnic background or income
- The right to a satisfying career with fair pay, job security and an eight-hour workday
- Respect for other cultures and honesty in our dealings with other countries
- The right to worship the deity of your choice (or not)
- Family values, meaning the right of anyone to form a family if they wish
- Compassion for the poor and sick
- Belief in the value of: fresh food, recycling, renewable energy,
independent bookstores and movie theatres, literacy, the free exchange of ideas, clean air, clean water, sushi, Julia Child cookbooks, Scrabble, humor, honesty,exercise, art, poetry, community gardens, mass transit, local cheese, the scientific process, the theory of Evolution, national parks, bicycles, music, sidewalks, trees, books, family farms, locally-owned diners with revolving pie cabinets, and decent coffee.
Membership
Membership in Blue America will be limited to residents of states that voted "blue" in the 2004 election, with the following exceptions:
1. Red "carriers" (or "vectors") who are currently living in BlueAmerica are kindly asked to leave before the liberation.
2. Members of certain Blue outposts in red america (like Austin,Texas) will be allowed to apply for Blue America citizenship.
3. Members of Blue outposts in Ohio (Oberlin) will also be allowed to apply for citizenship. However, if accepted they must accept a one-year probationary period. Similarly, members of Blue outposts in Florida(South Beach) will also be allowed to apply, but must accept a two-year probationary period.
4. Members of the Bush family are excluded for life, as are members of the Bush cabinet and all Fox News anchors, and Kid Rock. (Sorry, ColinPowell, but you had your chance.)
Sports
The first official sports team of Blue America will be the Boston RedSox (hereby re-named the Boston Blue Sox). However, red propagandist Curt> Schilling will be cut from the Sox and banished to the worst team in baseball. Also, we'll take Derek Jeter, if he's interested. {llama note: some of us are not interested in Jeter aka "smug bastard" and would vote to amend this section of the charter}
Timetable
Engineers have already begun separating northern Maine from the continent. We plan to be fully liberated and set sail on Blue Inauguration day, January 21, 2005. Pack your guitars, books and Hawaiian shirts, and let'shear it for the blue, white and blue!
Bring on the saw!
Blue America Charter
Fellow citizens!
It gives me great happiness to unveil our plans for the liberation ofBlue America. For the past three years, we have, in conjunction with a handful of MIT engineers, been constructing a giant, cordless circular saw,which is now complete. With this saw, we plan to carve our thriving,prosperous eastern Blue nation away from the spreading infection of red america. We will then set a mighty sail, which will carry us around the tip ofSouth America and allow us to join our Blue compadres on the West Coast. We will use our giant saw to free our friends, then join our two lands together and sail to a designated point in the Pacific Ocean. There, we will establish our new country: Blue America.
Basic Tenets
Blue America will be founded on the same ideals as the former UnitedStates of America. These ideals, sadly, have been decimated by the same redplague that scrambled the brains of so many of our unfortunate former fellow-citizens. These ideals include:
- The Separation of Church and State
- Freedom of Speech
- Freedom of Assembly and Protest
- Equal rights for all and due process under the Constitution
Blue America will have many additional aspirations not shared by red america, including:
- The goal of giving every citizen high quality education and healthcare (even prescription drugs!), regardless of their race, ethnic background or income
- The right to a satisfying career with fair pay, job security and an eight-hour workday
- Respect for other cultures and honesty in our dealings with other countries
- The right to worship the deity of your choice (or not)
- Family values, meaning the right of anyone to form a family if they wish
- Compassion for the poor and sick
- Belief in the value of: fresh food, recycling, renewable energy,
independent bookstores and movie theatres, literacy, the free exchange of ideas, clean air, clean water, sushi, Julia Child cookbooks, Scrabble, humor, honesty,exercise, art, poetry, community gardens, mass transit, local cheese, the scientific process, the theory of Evolution, national parks, bicycles, music, sidewalks, trees, books, family farms, locally-owned diners with revolving pie cabinets, and decent coffee.
Membership
Membership in Blue America will be limited to residents of states that voted "blue" in the 2004 election, with the following exceptions:
1. Red "carriers" (or "vectors") who are currently living in BlueAmerica are kindly asked to leave before the liberation.
2. Members of certain Blue outposts in red america (like Austin,Texas) will be allowed to apply for Blue America citizenship.
3. Members of Blue outposts in Ohio (Oberlin) will also be allowed to apply for citizenship. However, if accepted they must accept a one-year probationary period. Similarly, members of Blue outposts in Florida(South Beach) will also be allowed to apply, but must accept a two-year probationary period.
4. Members of the Bush family are excluded for life, as are members of the Bush cabinet and all Fox News anchors, and Kid Rock. (Sorry, ColinPowell, but you had your chance.)
Sports
The first official sports team of Blue America will be the Boston RedSox (hereby re-named the Boston Blue Sox). However, red propagandist Curt> Schilling will be cut from the Sox and banished to the worst team in baseball. Also, we'll take Derek Jeter, if he's interested. {llama note: some of us are not interested in Jeter aka "smug bastard" and would vote to amend this section of the charter}
Timetable
Engineers have already begun separating northern Maine from the continent. We plan to be fully liberated and set sail on Blue Inauguration day, January 21, 2005. Pack your guitars, books and Hawaiian shirts, and let'shear it for the blue, white and blue!
Bring on the saw!
Historical Perspective
In fact, far from being a mandate, and despite the 58 million who voted for the scary weasel, this was the weakest incumbent reelection in decades. http://interestingtimes.typepad.com/interesting_times/2004/11/some_historical.html
Let's Do Something
I can't remember where I read this, but somewhere I read about a woman who was able to vote for the first time, and voted for John Kerry. Despite the fact that Kerry lost, she felt that being able to vote was liberating, that she finally had a voice. And, just because Kerry lost, she was not prepared to be silenced. So she is going to write Bush a letter a day.
Now, I think that writing a letter a day will probably get me investigated by the FBI. And, though I'm sure that I will have several things to say about Bush, I don't know if I can write 365 compelling letters a year for the next four years. But I do plan to write him regularly, once month, to remind him that 51% is not a mandate. That 55,564,633 of us voted for the other guy. And tell him why.
Because I will not stand by silently out of despair and fear and watch my country go even further in the wrong direction.
Now, I think that writing a letter a day will probably get me investigated by the FBI. And, though I'm sure that I will have several things to say about Bush, I don't know if I can write 365 compelling letters a year for the next four years. But I do plan to write him regularly, once month, to remind him that 51% is not a mandate. That 55,564,633 of us voted for the other guy. And tell him why.
Because I will not stand by silently out of despair and fear and watch my country go even further in the wrong direction.
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